Meredith's Labour and Delivery Story

so here, in a nut shell is my L&D :)

As you all know, my due date came...and went. Then another 7 days passed by, and then 10 days, and it was time to start the NST's and see what Boo-ya(baby's nickname) thought she was doing in there. My first NST we were hooked to the monitor for an hour trying to get her to bounce around a bit, and get those 3 variations that the MW was looking for. A couple days later I went for a second NST and though we got the 3 variations in only about 40 minutes, she was still fairly quiet with the monitor on...of course both times, once I was in the car heading home again she woke up. She had been a tad stubborn for US's during the pregnancy, and with her not wanting to 'talk' to us during the NST's we should have known what was coming with the L&D LOL. After the second NST, I had a sweep done and then headed home with Allison to drink the herbal cocktail in hopes that would start things moving along. About 4 hours after drinking it my bowels emptied..but no CTX, nothing. Had a couple twinges, but they were up high, never going below my belly button.

That was on the Friday...Monday morning I called the hospital at 630am, as directed by my MW to see if they had time for me to come and get induced. They said yup, for sure, they were expecting me. So off we went. I got hooked up to the NST monitors (at 7am) again to get the read out for the OB to check when he came in, and again boo-ya was fairly quiet, she rolled around a bit to let us know she was there, but really didn't like putting on a show for those monitors at all. When the OB came in we talked about induction methods, he made a couple real good jokes, which I didn't think was possible of him. He did an internal, I was still only at 1-2cms and he suggested the gel, so in it went. I had to stay on the monitor for an hour and then they sent me home. If nothing happened I was to go back at 1:00 for another dose. And guess what...nothing happened. The ctx were showing on the monitor, but i felt NOTHING. So back we went for 1:00 and we once again put some gel in, hooked up to the monitors for the required hour of watching and there were some ctx's on the monitor, though I didn't feel a thing. I walked around the hallways a bit, having a few ctx, though nothing that i couldn't walk or talk through...so home we went, again. The OB was in the OR when I was sent home so we waited for a call to see whether they wanted me back at 9 that night or to wait till the morning. The call came and we were told that if my water broke or ctx were full blown, to come back that night, otherwise, to come again in the morning. As the night progressed I was getting uncomfortable and kept changing what chair i sat in, and what not. I had my coach and doula there with me, but we figured it would be best to go get some sleep in case this was it. I have to say that I was a bit nervous about going to bed as with the first bit of gel, as soon as I lay down all possible ctx's stopped. So after everyone left I went to bed at about 930...imagine my shock and dismay when I woke to a text from Leia at 430am...with no ctx happening...I was upset.

So I called the hospital again at 630am, let them know how the night went and that I was heading back in. Mom and I met the MW, Allison (doula),and the IPs at the hospital to now by told that Pitocin was the way we would be going. They mentioned the Foley catheter, but we didn't go that way as my cervix just wasn't responding and we all agreed that we didn't want to go through another day like the day before. SO off we went to the L&D rooms they had booked for us (one for L&D and one for the IPs) to get set up for the IV. Once it was in they wanted to monitor and see how things were going. They started me on a fairly moderate dose as we had already gone through 2 gel inductions.

The nurse I had was amazing, a wonderful sense of humour, and the OB (now someone else, another i had not worked with) was very good as well. So there we sat, me with my Ips and birth team ( mom , Allison and James) and Nancy the nurse...talking, making jokes, having a good time. Nancy said that they would up the pitocin every ½ hour to get things going. After 2 ups, we decided to start walking the halls again. I wasn't feeling anything at all, and we joked that maybe the pitocin wasn't actually getting into me. The only feeling I got was when I would do a lap of the halls, stop and stand still for a minute-but it was only pressure of Boo-ya's head. As things were not really moving ahead, James went home to check in with the wife, don some running around for work and said he would check in every hour to see how things were going, unless we called sooner to tell him to come back.

So we walked for a bit longer and then went back to the room. By this time we had upped the drip 4 times and Nancy had asked if I was feeling anything. I told her nope, nothing. She would watch the monitor, tell me when a ctx was building and just look at me expectantly...LOL, nope nothing more than a very mild ache on the top of the uterus. So I thought maybe laying down would help, so during the NSTs, having to lay on my back for the hour drove me crazy...so down i went. The OB came in somewhere in here to check me, as the drip had been upped so many times and I was still only feeling a mild acheyness, nothing painful at all, and still only from the top of the uterus down to about my belly button, no cervix ctx at all. He checked me and said I was at about 6cm and would see me in about 4 hours to deliver the baby. OK. Sounded good to me.

Boo-ya had always kicked/punched at the monitors whenever we moved them, so we knew she was all good. I decided after being on my back that I would roll over onto my left side and we would get readjusted with the monitors.

This was at about noon. I rolled onto my left side and we were just placing the monitors again when I felt what I thought was boo-ya giving the biggest kick against them she had ever done. I thought in my head that something about that wasn't right, and said out loud, i don't think she liked that position at all, that was a huge kick. It felt really weird. Nancy came around the bed, as she was behind me, and as she got around I said OH! It wasn't a kick I think my waters broke...as it started gushing. (This was another first for me as with my own kids, the first one trickled the whole time, and my second it burst with a ctx and the next ctx she was out.)

Mom got on the phone with James right away and let him know my water just broke and he needed to come back, as the CTX at this point kicked in full force. But still ladies, I have to say it was not painful, it was more annoying, like a terrible stomach cramp that I couldn't get away from. Allison and mom helped me to breath through them and were great. I think the OB might have checked me again at some point before Boo-ya made an appearance (maybe Allison can answer that one)

I just totally concentrated on what was happening, that people were saying in between ctx to slow my breathing, that I was doing good. I was thinking to myself that James was going to miss this, that through all the pregnancy this was what he was meant to be here for, and it was happening too fast. I knew the moment he came into the room, not because he announced his arrival, but because he is a smoker and I could smell him. I heard someone, I think my mom, say that James had arrived and was just washing his hands. He got over to me, and I hung on to him.

(Don't get me wrong, I have had awesome support from everyone through the whole surrogacy, my doula, MW, Mom, CFC, family and friends...but he was the person who was going to be my 'lifeline'.... my main support through the bearing down and getting boo-ya out. So to know he was there and to be able to have him to hang onto...everything was going to be OK)

I heard the OB and MW tell me that I needed to roll off my side and onto my back as baby was crowning. That I had to let go of James ( I had my right arm wrapped around his shoulders) I tried to tell them to go ahead and move me, but I couldn't get a breath big enough to talk at all. Next thing I knew Someone had taken my arm from around James, someone grabbed my right leg and they hauled me over LOL. Then I was being told that baby was crowning...I thought to myself, if she was crowing she was doing it way high up, as it still felt like she hadn't come down at all! I thought they were crazy. I beared down with the next ctx, and before I knew what had happened there was a baby on my chest. Did I feel it, nope. Was I surprised as hell that with no PAINFUL ctx, or what I remembered crowning and baby popping out to feel like with my kids, that suddenly there was a tiny baby on me... HELL YES!!!

The Ips had stayed back during the actual L&D, at this point they were right beside me and as I kept my arm around the back of Boo-ya to keep her on my chest, my left hand was holding onto my IM (she was closest) saying here's your baby, OMG she is here, touch her touch her, it's your baby...and all those random happy nonsense type things. They were both in tears of course and I was just brimming with Joy and Awe at what I just did for them! Boo-ya lay on me for a few minutes while we fussed over her. They dried her off and once the cord stopped pulsating the IF cut the cord and they followed their baby over to the heated baby area to get her checked out.

While they were busy with her, I clued in that 'hey, there was still an OB between my legs' the placenta still needed to be delivered, this took longer than transition did. After that I needed to be stitched up as well, the OB was so good about it all, kept apologizing as the freezing didn't take very well as it was through scar tissue, (episiotomy with son) but not much he could do about that. Nancy, the nurse, showed me the shot of Fentanyl saying, I went to get this but you never asked, guess I will put it back !

And so...On January 18th, 14 days over due, My surro baby Sydney Marlowe H. was born at 12:56. From water breaking 49 minutes till baby! 7 pounds 5 ounces, head of hair (knew that from all the darn heartburn), 20inches long. Yes my ego has kicked in so I have no problem bragging...I ROCKED THAT LABOUR AND DELIVERY!!!

I am so proud of what I did for the parents, to have made them a family after all their years of struggles through IVF and Surrogacy. I had an awesome journey and through the first 40 weeks I only had one slightly negative comment from someone when the situation was explained to them. Everyone kept telling me what an incredible thing this was that I was doing, what an angel I was, they couldn't imagine doing the same for someone—these comments I had troubles accepting, only because I thought to myself the whole time that I was only doing what anyone else would do if they heard someone couldn't have a child, and they themselves were still able to.

It wasn't until after Sydney was born and a great friend (Kat, LOVE YOU!!) made me click that NO, not anyone could do this and YES, I was amazing (here is the ego again, get used to it everyone) This is quite the undertaking and, even though during the last two weeks when people started throwing some negative comments to me, and their negative opinions about why I was overdue...I can overlook that because this WAS amazing, this WAS incredible and WILL ALWAYS BE something I can be proud of, and brag about!

Have to include my thank you's as I feel it is just as important as the L&D story. In no particular order...

My family, immediate and extended-they have always been there for me, no matter what their opinions, they have been my constants and I appreciate every one of them. Thank you, thank you , thank you.

The New Parents, without who my journey wouldn't have happened. We clicked from day 1, and never had any issues with each other. They were amazing to build a family for and I wish them all the best as they bond with Sydney and become the loving family I know they will be.

To _____, OMG where to start?! Let's start with the 'work' relationship. If it wasn't for you I would be lost in the online Indy forums of surrogacy. You made it all so easy to understand and were there every step of the way with any silly questions I had, never condescending like some of the other consultants out there that I have heard about. And then there is the friendship that we have. Even though your job pulled you off the Island and back to Ontario we have remained as close as ever. You were available all hours of the day, a constant support through good and bad times that I have gone through in the past 2 years that I have known you, and I could not ask for a better friend than the one I have found in you.

To Tiffany (aka Allison) thank you so much for your support as a fellow local surrogate, and as my doula! Not sure how much of that you got to use during the super quick delivery LOL, and for being available at any time when I have had questions.

Angele!!! Fellow surro, who was and still is, so inspiring to me! Thank you for posting to the ladies during my L&D! It was great to finally have met you last November and you will always be a friend!! WOOHOO GURUS!!

My amazing _____ ladies...To all of you for your constant love and support over the past almost 2 years. NO matter what the question/comment/concern you have always been there and I value each and everyone of you. This journey that we share is something that we will remember our whole lives..BE PROUD LADIES!!!

And finally, James. Left till the end only because this thank you is the most emotional for me. First let me say thank you to your beautiful wife Kat, for sharing you with me for this incredible journey. XOXO KAT.
I have already told you how I feel about all you have done for me during this 42 week journey, so I will try to keep it simple here. Thank you just doesn't cover it, your constant support, your willingness to do anything for me, coming to prenatal, BFW classes, letting me vent when I needed, being my physical strength and support (just like that Obsidian chunk) that I counted on you for...You are amazing and having you involved in my journey to this extent( and so much more) will always be appreciated and cherished.

And so, while this actually is the short version of it all, there it is.


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Comment by Jodi Adams on April 13, 2011 at 4:08pm
I'm a little confused. Who is James?

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