Everyone has a story. Whether it is their life story, a story about a difficult experience, or their reproductive story. When I say "reproductive story," I'm not talking about the current journey that you may be on. Certainly, this is a part of your tale. But it's the middle part.
Our reproductive stories are interwoven with those of our partner's. They originate from our early experiences with the concepts of "mothering", "nurturing," and "family." Maybe you used to play with dolls. Maybe you had to take care of other siblings. These experiences lend themselves to your story. Your reproductive story also entails the relationships that you have had with others, both the positive ones and the negative ones. Are there things that you vowed to yourself that you would NEVER repeat when you had kids?
Often, we don't take the time to get to know the story of our partner. We know how they grew up, what their favorite things are, perhaps their fears. But not the background to their thoughts on family. Was it always assumed that they would be a parent? Did they "nurture" their toys, like trucks? (I know, this is a funny thought, but for boys, their play is around protection, which is an idealized way of viewing a father--the ultimate protector.)
Unraveling the strands of your story, even as it might be unfolding currently around infertility, can be an important step in understanding the meaning of infertility for you. This can also bring some closure and healing around some of the emotional complexities that come with an infertility diagnosis and treatment.
What is your Reproductive Story?